How He Loves

I had an epiphany Sunday night at church.  As I stood in a dimly lit sanctuary, surrounded by friends singing out hymns of praise to our one true God, I set the sight of my blinded eyes on my growing awareness of social injustices across our globe.  Silently, while meditating on the great tragedies of our time, I listened to God's people sing, "Oh, how He loves us so. Oh, how He loves us.  How he loves us so."  Their voices were earnest, filled with emotion, filled with acceptance, filled with gratitude.  And as I stood in the midst of a room enchanted by God's love, deep within I felt a voice speak:

"What about them?"

Startled by the question, I began to realize, perhaps for the first time ever, what a truly unique position I am in.  I have lived a beautiful life, I have been raised by a beautiful family, and I have lived a life of freedom.  Thankfully, I have also lived a life cognizant of who God is, what His salvation means, and have become more in-tune with His love with each passing year.  But......

What about them?

What about those who have lived a tortured life?  What about those whose family has posed as their own worst enemy?  What about those who have live a life of slavery, whether it be slave to man, slave to self, or slave to destruction?  And what about those who have never even heard mention of this God who "loves us so"?

Are they any less deserving of His love?  ....   Forget that question.

Is He any less gracious with His love? 

In that moment, it began to become clear to me how incredibly selfish I have been.  For 29 years now, I have been living my comfortable life, comfortably loving my family, comfortably loving and serving my God, and comfortably resting in His freedom. 

Who am I to keep it all for myself?  Who am I to believe whole-heartedly in the healing freedom of Christ, yet do nothing in attempts to bring that same freedom to others?  Who am I to sit in a room, sing about His lavish and unending love, and in turn hoard it all and ignore the plight of millions living in chains, with little opportunity or even knowledge of how to fight for their own freedom?

On the other side of this realization, I am hesitant to be so bold as to say it is a new day.  But, I will at least concede that it is a new tide.

When I was perhaps a junior or senior in high school, I could see that my life could go in one of two directions.  Realizing the fork that was ahead, I remember coming before my Father with this heart-felt prayer:  "Father, it is my desire in life to be an attorney and have a family.  And I can see myself being very good at that.  But I can see myself becoming so dedicated to my career and so involved in my family that I lose sight of you.  So I pray that regardless of where my life would take me, I pray that I will never forsake or lose sight of you.  I pray that my relationship would never stray from you and that I would never put you on the backburner in order to live 'the rest' of my life."

In hindsight, I have no idea where that prayer came from.  But I realized today that ever since that prayer 10-12 years ago, one by one, the Lord has been giving me puzzle pieces that I have unknowingly received and tucked away.  I believe He is now calling me to pull out those pieces and watch as they fit together.  I do not believe I currently possess all the pieces I will need to finish the jigsaw, but like any good student of puzzlery, I am hopeful to believe I now have at least the borders.  And as the borders start to fall into place, I am amazed, encouraged, and even challenged by the picture which is starting to take shape.  Yet my answer remains resolute:  I trust in You, Lord.  May it be as you say.

"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I - I took the one less traveled by.  And that has made all the difference." - Robert Frost.