My Stupid Mouth
For me, friends, the third time is always the charm. I will be walking along, ho hum through out my day, and God will bring a particular verse or passage or character to my attention. We'll call this a "Moment". It could be through conversations with friends, a verse in a sermon, or a line of a song. Something about whatever is said will jump out at me. I'll think, "Hm... that's interesting....", shrug my shoulders, and move on.
The second time the Moment hits me, it causes me a little more pause, a little more hesitation, but is typically followed with the same shrug and the same passivity.
The third time, however.... the third time is when I finally have the "Ah-HA Moment" and realize that God is trying to get me to actually pick up on what He's been calling to my attention. And then it makes sense to me all the "coincidences" of coming across the same topic or theme. Maybe one of these days, I'll learn to pay attention on the first round, or at least notice the pattern by the second round and not have to make it to the third.
Anyway, my Moment as of late has been on the things I let come out of my mouth and how it's a reflection of my heart. Typically this happens in the workplace where gossip and behind-the-back conversations are normal, if not expected. It's easy for me to spot when I am gossiping. Not always easy to stop, but at least easy to spot. Even when I do catch myself, though, even when I do actually hold my tongue.... I've been realizing lately that it doesn't even matter. That's not the point.
Do you ever …get a glimpse of your natural, completely unhindered reaction to people and get absolutely disgusted?
A few nights ago, I was in line behind an older man who couldn't decide what he needed and it was holding me up. I got very frustrated and started making disparaging comments about him in my head.
Disgusting.
I caught myself and immediately repented…. But then it left me wondering why my natural reaction to this man was one of hate? It certainly is not the way I was raised to respond to people, nor is it how I was created. After the Lord changed my heart and my attitude, I actually fell in LOVE with him… and just wanted to walk up to him and HUG him. And have him talk to me. And be able to look into his eyes and bring comfort to his heart. And I felt so very horrible about the ways I had wronged him that he wasn't even aware of. And I prayed for the Lord to bless his heart. How I long for that to be my natural reaction!!!
Twice since then that I am aware of, I found myself in a similar situation at work; getting frustrated with simply idiosyncratic traits of those I work with... placing myself on a pedestal by judging them internally. Really, it just is repulsive to me my natural reaction at times.
But as always, when God is trying to get a message across, He will point you to applicable scripture. I have my sights on reading the bible in a year and have been using this book... each day it has a section of the Old Testament, the New Testament, a Psalm and a Proverb. Each night, before I fall asleep, I read. These have been the verses from Proverbs chapter 10 this week...
The second time the Moment hits me, it causes me a little more pause, a little more hesitation, but is typically followed with the same shrug and the same passivity.
The third time, however.... the third time is when I finally have the "Ah-HA Moment" and realize that God is trying to get me to actually pick up on what He's been calling to my attention. And then it makes sense to me all the "coincidences" of coming across the same topic or theme. Maybe one of these days, I'll learn to pay attention on the first round, or at least notice the pattern by the second round and not have to make it to the third.
Anyway, my Moment as of late has been on the things I let come out of my mouth and how it's a reflection of my heart. Typically this happens in the workplace where gossip and behind-the-back conversations are normal, if not expected. It's easy for me to spot when I am gossiping. Not always easy to stop, but at least easy to spot. Even when I do catch myself, though, even when I do actually hold my tongue.... I've been realizing lately that it doesn't even matter. That's not the point.
Do you ever …get a glimpse of your natural, completely unhindered reaction to people and get absolutely disgusted?
A few nights ago, I was in line behind an older man who couldn't decide what he needed and it was holding me up. I got very frustrated and started making disparaging comments about him in my head.
Disgusting.
I caught myself and immediately repented…. But then it left me wondering why my natural reaction to this man was one of hate? It certainly is not the way I was raised to respond to people, nor is it how I was created. After the Lord changed my heart and my attitude, I actually fell in LOVE with him… and just wanted to walk up to him and HUG him. And have him talk to me. And be able to look into his eyes and bring comfort to his heart. And I felt so very horrible about the ways I had wronged him that he wasn't even aware of. And I prayed for the Lord to bless his heart. How I long for that to be my natural reaction!!!
Twice since then that I am aware of, I found myself in a similar situation at work; getting frustrated with simply idiosyncratic traits of those I work with... placing myself on a pedestal by judging them internally. Really, it just is repulsive to me my natural reaction at times.
But as always, when God is trying to get a message across, He will point you to applicable scripture. I have my sights on reading the bible in a year and have been using this book... each day it has a section of the Old Testament, the New Testament, a Psalm and a Proverb. Each night, before I fall asleep, I read. These have been the verses from Proverbs chapter 10 this week...
17 He who heeds discipline shows the way to life, but whoever ignores correction leads others astray.
18 He who conceals his hatred has lying lips, and whoever spreads slander is a fool.
19 When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.
20 The tongue of the righteous is choice silver, but the heart of the wicked is of little value.
My prayer is to bring the Lord value. In my thoughts, in my actions, in my heart. I want to honor Him. It is always discouraging when you're brought face to face with the muck in your own heart. But I am so very thankful the Lord uses opportunities like this to discipline me, to train me, to LOVE me.
Oh, it is good to be a Child of God. It makes me Smile. :)
May the words of my heart and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to you, Oh Lord.
May the words of my heart and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to you, Oh Lord.
posted by BJ at 8:33 AM
2 Comments:
On behalf of old men everywhere, thank you for your tolerance and understanding. We love you, too.
Great thoughts Beej. I appreciate your thoughts and personal vulnerability. Keep writing!
Post a Comment
<< Home