Some Kind of Miracle

Another bundle of joy has graced the presence of my ever-growing family. That's 5 1/2 babies (still have one bun in the oven) in less than 4 years. CRAZY. Regardless, welcome to the world, baby Miles. Prepare to be blown away. :)

This Old Guitar

I am blessed beyond words. I have the most amazing friends and family ever. As you all know, my guitar broke. I was sad. Angela offered to give me her guitar. I was happy, I was blessed, I thanked God. (see previous post if you have no idea what I'm talking about...) Apparently, that blessing simply wasn't enough. Over the weekend, it was revealed to me that several (aka MANY) of my friends chipped money into a pot in order to purchase me a new guitar. Apparently, Angela didn't know this was the plan when she offered me her guitar and later got chastised for her generosity by the originator of the "new guitar for BJ" fund. Sorry, Ang. :) Anyway, long story short, I am blessed beyond words. I really am just so incredibly overwhelmed by the generosity of my friends, by their desire to bless me, and by the overwhelming love God has for me that drove it all. I really wish I could vocalize accurately how the amazing outpour of love and support has touched me, but really the only words I can think of are humbled, overwhelmed, and blessed. Thank you thank you thank you. Thank you for being the visible tangible hand of God sent to make me smile. How GREAT is the love the Father has lavished upon me....

Restored

My friends, our God is faithful. I'm not sure why I ever doubted it, questioned it, forgot it, overlooked it, or denied it. God is faithful. Last night, I was telling my dear friend Angela about my guitar woes and after she heard my story, she said, "Beej, can I tell you something?" sure, go for it. I thought she was going to change the subject to something more pressing (like her upcoming nuptials!). She simply said, "I want to give you my guitar."

What?!?!?

I told her it wasn't necessary, that I was OK and that there was no reason in the WORLD why she needed to give me her guitar. She responded by saying that she bought the guitar several years ago with the intention of learning how to play, but that it had been stored at her parents house for the last two years, not even being touched. And, if she ever DID want to learn, Dom has two guitars so she could just use one of his. She was very persuasive and generous, so I accepted. So as of tonight, I will be the new owner of Angela's guitar. I am so blessed. To top it off, she won't even let me give her any money for it. I am blessed.

I tell you this not to boast of my friends (who are AMAZING) nor to brag of my new guitar (which I am so excited about). I tell you this because through such a small and simple gesture, the Lord has restored me. I was so upset about my guitar breaking for several different reasons, the least of which actually being that the guitar was broken. And lately, I've just had a really hard time seeing how God is working and what He is doing in my life. Last night, through the kindness of my dear friend, the Lord reminded me that He IS faithful, He DOES love me, and He WILL take care of me. Even in the small things. Shall I not trust Him with the big things as well?

A big prayer of mine lately has been to simply focus on the Love God has for me and the way He desires to reveal that to me. I feel like it's something I've been overlooking lately... focusing my thoughts on people rather than Him, desires rather than blessings, confusion rather than His promises. The bottom line is that He loves me with an everlasting love, He pursues me with a godly jealousy, He is ONLY working for my good, He will never leave me or forsake me, He knows my innermost thoughts and loves me in spite of them, and above all, HE IS FAITHFUL. His future for me is full of hope and prosperity. He is within me, I will not fall. And he uses the simplest things, like a broken guitar, to remind me of such. His mercies are new every morning and I continue to stand amazed.

"Moses answered the people, 'Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians (hardships) you see today you will never see again. The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.'" Exodus 14:13-14

"How great is the love the Father has lavished upon us that we should be called the children of God." 1John 3:1

"I have set the Lord always before me, Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure, because you will not abandon me to the grave, nor will you let your Holy One see decay. You have made known to me the path of life; You will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand." Psalm 16:8-11

"Praise be to the LORD God, the God of Israel, who alone does marvelous deeds.!" Psalm 72:18

Broken Again

I've experienced a tragic loss. Last night, while on the phone with Tyler, I saw my guitar move out of the corner of my eye. I looked at it and all was well. I thought, "Well, I just put it back on the stand about 5 minutes ago, so I bet it just shifted a bit." A few moments later, in the slowest of all slow-motions ever, my guitar leaned forward and met its demise by belly-flopping onto my hardwood floor. I was shocked. I saw it coming, yet I couldn't do anything but sit there and watch. Time was frozen. I gasped. Tyler heard the crash and immediately asked what happened. I was aghast with denial. I stammered out, "um, I'm going to have to call you back." He again asked, "Beej, that didn't sound good. Are you ok? What happened?" After trying to explain what happened but not even being able to vocalize it, I just said, "Ty, I need to call you back" and hung up the phone. My roomie was calling at me from the other room, "BJ, are you ok? What happened?" I sat. I stared. I pleaded with time to rewind. Michelle came in, saw the guitar still on the floor, neck detached and strings limp. As she picked it up and tried to put it back together, mentioning that I might try superglue, I just sat and stared. And then, I cried. No joke. Not necessarily for the guitar itself (although I am very upset about that), but also for the loss of what it represented (personal quiet time and worship of God) and how desperately I desire that right now. I still don't think I've actually touched my guitar.... It's like when someone dies and you get so mad at that person for leaving you. And I am sad. This picture isn't a picture of my guitar, but it shows exactly where it broke. Definitely not fixable. Good thing you sent the flowers last week, mom and dad. They're coming in handy this week too. :)

I'm not quite sure how any of this can be blamed on Tyler leaving me for Boston, but I'm sure I'll find a way.

Speechless

Anyone have anything they wanna share? Preferably something to make me laugh?? Come on.... It'll be fun.... :)

Thankful

I feel so loved. :) Thanks, Mom and Dad. I am blessed beyond words by your love and grace.

"Then you will call, and the LORD will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I. " Isaiah 58:9

Nothing ever happens on Mars

Nothing ever happens on Mars

No sports or entertainment, or swinging bars

You stand around,

you stand some more

On a planet named for a Roman god of war

Nothing ever happens on Mars

No supersonic airplanes, no sporty cars

The sun comes up, the sun goes down

You can't go to the country, you can't go to town

Boring...Boring...Boring...Boring

Boring...Boring...Boring...Boring

Circle

All my life's a circle
Sunrise and sundown
Moon rolls thru the nighttime
Till the daybreak comes around.
All my life's a circle
But I can't tell you why
Season's spinning round again
The years keep rollin' by.

Dreamland Express

If I had a dollar for every minute I have laid in bed wishing I was asleep, I would be a rich, rich lady. Almost as rich as I would be if I had a dollar for everytime I've said the phrases "sweet action" and "that's intense" as of late. I'm not sure where or why I picked up these phrases, nor do I know why I use them constantly. They are fairly functional, however. Try to use either phrase within the next 24 hours so I'm not the only one who sounds like a tool. Happy Friday to you all. The weekend is upon us. peace out.