I guess I'd rather be in Colorado...

So here I sit at the lovely YMCA of the Rockies trying to recover from the over-night trek through Kansas. I’ll tell you the Number 1 thing that stinks about Kansas is that there is absolutely NO cell phone signal available. If it were during the daytime, it might not have been a problem. If I weren’t by myself in a car, it definitely wouldn’t have been a problem. But given the fact that I was all by my lonesome driving from 7 pm to 5 am, I was hurting. Probably a good thing, though, that I didn’t have much of a signal. Might have upset a few friends if they received a phone call from me at such an hour. Trust me, I tried. I just did not prevail.

Anyway, it’s good to be here. I have already visited with several friends I made when I worked out here a few summers ago and it has been fun to see them. It’s fun to think of the ways God brings people into your life through completely random circumstances that just turns out to be a blessing. I approve. :)

Those of you who know me know that I enjoy messing with people. I have been known from time to time to pull some theory out of thin air, deliver with complete conviction and authority, leaving all who listen confident of my expertise on the subject and doubtless of the truth of the matter. Recently, however, that came back to bite me. Literally. Last weekend, I was in Kirksville with some friends and we decided to go out to Rainbow Basin to go hiking. In deciding what to wear, although the heat was next to unbearable, everyone but me chose to wear jeans. Their reasoning cited tall grass and prevalence of ticks. I told them that wearing jeans was a horrible idea and that it defeated the very purpose of avoiding ticks. I explained that when walking through the tall grass, the ticks will latch onto a textured fabric, such as jeans, with much greater ease than they would bear legs. I had no actual factual evidence to support my theory and had, in fact, just made it up on the spot, but I didn’t tell them that. It is actually common knowledge that most experts suggest covering your body woth pants, long t-shirts, etc. to avoid contact with the menacing creatures. My friends, however, had no knowledge of such advice and it is safe to say that I am no expert on the subject. I was very close to persuading a few of them, but when it was all said and done, we set out for the hike with everyone clad in jeans except for yours truly.

Lo and behold, I am a genius. Repeatedly along the hike, we stopped and checked for ticks; each stop yielding about half a dozen or so on each of my friends’ legs. I myself only found I think 2 ticks on the entire hike crawling on me. Let it be shown that my theory, once a simple fabrication of what SEEMED to be true, has now been tested and proved. I am most likely the smartest person you will ever meet for the level of education I have. The catch, though? Chiggers, my friends, prefer the bare-skinned patrons and I have unsightly bug bites all over my legs, accompanied by scratches from the tall grass and twigs.

Moral of the story? Just because my theories are purely a stroke of genius and always prove true, they may not always be the best to follow. Let that be a lesson to you all.

***Bonus points to anyone who can guess the artist of the song, "I guess he'd rather be in Colorado...He'd rather spend his time out where the sky looks like a pearle after the rain...."